Category — Sharon Stone

No, I didnt’ think it was going to be any good. But these bad reviews are just too funny to ignore. Especially following the bizarro publicity campaign Sharon Stone has been putting on for the last month or so. Enjoy…

From Page SIX:

MAYBE Sharon Stone should have listened to those who thought “Basic Instinct 2″ was a bad idea. At the premiere Monday night, audience members kept cracking up at inappropriate times, like when Stone intones, “Not even Oedipus saw his mother coming!” “The only thing worse than the dialogue were Sharon’s implants,” shrieked one wag. During the full-frontal nude scene, Stone’s bosom seemed lopsided. But nary a negative word was uttered at the after-party at Mr. Chow sponsored by Dior.

From AintItCool:

… a miserable train wreck of a thriller groaning under the weight of dialog so bad it becomes epic in it’s own right. You see, while this film isn’t epic in the same fashion as an Eszterhas thriller, it easily, without hyperbole, becomes a top entry into the ‘worst sequel to a blockbuster film of all time’ list. It makes Godfather 3 and Episode I look like gargantuan successes, and manages to make Speed 2 and Jaws: The Revenge seem watchable by comparison. Seriously, this movie is just…that…bad.

From Moviehole:

The Joe Eszterhas-written original wasn’t a fantastic film, but it was an enjoyable one – it had a gorgeous look to it, some really well choreographed sex scenes, and for the most part, quite an engaging storyline. This, on the other hand, couldn’t even get the sex bit right, and admittedly, that’s what quite a few will be coming to see. The few bits of rumpy-pumpy that the movie has are about as hot as walking on cement bare feet on a winter’s morning - yep, not at all. As for the storyline? What storyline? It’s a complete mess, not to mention about as electrifying as watching a second coat-dry on the exterior of a rusty dingy. Seems nobody even checked to make sure it made any sense either before greenlighting the beast. In fact, everything here is a shambles, so much so that “Basic Instinct 2” is going to go down in history as not only one of the worst sequels of all time, but also one of the worst films of all time. Come video, it may just have an ‘Alan Smithee’ credit festooned to its title sequence.

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Sharon Stone sure seems to be in the news a lot lately. Won’t it be great when BASIC INSTINCT 2 flops and she is ignored once again? But this latest story is pretty funny. In an interview with ContactMusic.com, Stone talks about some sex advice she gave to a teenage girl:

“I was in the store the other day and I watched a young girl trying on clothes, showing her abdomen. Her mother was trying to talk to her about not being inappropriately luring. I said, ‘Gee that would look much nicer with a camisole under.’ Her mother walked away, and I said to the girl, ‘I’d like to give you a two-minute conversation about sex.’ Young people talk to me about what to do if they’re being pressed for sex? I tell them (what I believe): oral sex is a hundred times safer than vaginal or anal sex. If you’re in a situation where you cannot get out of sex, offer a blow job. I’m not embarrassed to tell them.”

So according to Stone, if you are being date raped, just suck the guy off. This sounds like sage wisdom from an old hag that has spent too much time around Hollywood producers.

The whole BASIC INSTINCT 2 thing is so sad it’s starting to depress the hell out of me. First of all, nobody really gives a shit about Sharon Stone. Secondly, nobody wants to see her naked anymore. If I didn’t hate her, I would feel kind of bad that the only thing she can do to get attention at this stage in her career is get naked in an over-budget version of a Cinemax skinflick.

To made things even creepier, Stone is now starting to offer philosophical ramblings about all the thought that went into the planning of the BASIC INSTINCT 2 sex scenes. This is from the Evening Standard…

I felt we should hold off on the full nudity for a while in the movie and then I thought that when I ultimately did do the nude scene it should be done in a startling way that would be disturbing and threatening.

By the time the film is released, I will be 48 and I wanted to do the nudity in a way that’s quite brazen. I wanted her to be very masculine, like a man in a steam room, and I wanted the audience to have a moment where they realise she’s naked and then realise she’s a fortysomething woman and naked. Because we’re not used to seeing that in movies. We’re used to seeing Sean Connery and his granddaughter, you know what I mean? Or Mel Gibson and his daughter.

None of this sounds like anything I want anywhere close to me while I am masturbating. And doesn’t that kind of defeat the purpose? Sorry, Sharon, I will stick to Mel Gibson’s daughter.

Another bit of pomposity from this interview is when Stone reveals: “This is BASIC INSTINCT the European version, not BASIC INSTINCT 2.”

See Sharon Stone in her prime at Mr. Skin! 

It looks like Sharon Stone is back to doing the one thing she was actually somewhat decent at… getting naked and sleazy. She returns to the role that made her famous in BASIC INSTINCT 2: RISK ADDICTION. RISK ADDICTION? Who came up with that title?

Hitting the web today is an “internet-exclusive” uncensored trailer with cheesy music, a crotch shot, lots of nudity and even more bumping and grinding. It’s like having Cinemax Late Night in a little window on your computer screen. I guess this is supposed to be sexy, but I find it absolutely freaking hilarious. BASIC INSTINCT is kind of responsible for the entire genre of direct to video erotic thrillers and the sequel looks bad even for one of those.

BASIC INSTINCT 2: RISK ADDICTION trailer